"Berat Angkat Kaki" (Hard To Lift Yourself To Act)

Being straightforward can mean 2 things:


Straightforward by words - The ability to speak out anything according to your own will regardless other people's thoughts about you. 


Straightforward by action - The ability to take action without any signs of hesitations. 


Just finished chating with somebody in order to find out new places for my next room. I hope everything's better when compared to now. Some of you might know the reason why I want to move. Let it be, kay? 


But, everytime before the moving season comes, I tend to feel held back by something. It's so difficult to express. It's like the same old feeling moments before I left Ridzuan Condominium during New Year this year. 


Maybe it's because I dislike changes. For sure, 2009 was a very different year when compared to 2008 and the previous years. 


These changes still affect me today. 


I decided to rent privately after staying under the college hostel for 2 years. It's been a nice experience staying with them. The reason why I tend to do so is to save money for the family. I felt that I'm becoming a liability than an asset. 


But, one of the drawbacks of this option, though I'll be having lower rates to pay, I might have to face some cunning landlords. (I'm sorry to my KL friends, but this is a fact on what I'm going to say later). 


Well, I feel that most of the city people are fake (plastic, as people used to say) and profit-minded as the office politics and stress in the employment world here are hyped up and most of them here are individualistic. A little bit of misconduct, especially while driving, will cause enough flame throughout the road. When it comes to politics, they will go on to RPK's Malaysia Today, Patrick Teoh's "Niamah" blog, Malaysiakini, etc. and spam rudely whenever something goes wrong. Some Chinese would rather support Namewee's arrogant complaints to the government and even recently, TNB. 


I'm glad that my West Malaysian coursemates are all friendly. Please maintain your kind attitudes when you're working, okay? :) 


Now, do you have an idea on how the attitudes of some of the landlords here? 


I'd heard enough of these people. Some of them will treat their tenants as if they are their slaves. Some will try to con young people like us. Some will underestimate you. Even if I request to find a Christian landlord, they may also be fakers, because Christians are also sinners like everybody else. 


Well, there are some certain cases where you have to be "berat mulut" to rescue yourself from being criticized by your friends behind your back. And also, there are sometimes you have to hesitate yourselves before you act. The future is blur ahead. Only God will know the direction you're heading. 


We want changes, but we're actually fear of changes.